Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Inquisitive Bubble

The Inquisitive Lot
Who is in this lot?
This lot contains bothersome relatives and neighbors, sometimes your old friends fall in to this category as well

Who is the target or rather victim?
Girls/ Women who have completed just their schooling/ Degree/ On the Job, Falling under 18-30 group

Characteristics of the Inquisitive lot
  • Manage to run in to us once in two days/a week and invariably annoy you by asking stupid questions, mostly personal.
  • Sometimes come up with intellectual ideas and stories of how well they managed a personal situation which they imagine that you’re facing now
  • They turn in to instant relationship gurus for futile (sometimes imaginary) problems, mostly personal again.

Why do they do this?
That’s question I have been thinking of ever since I completed my college and couldn’t get a logical answer. May be they
  • Are just jealous?
  • Get a sadistic pleasure of irritating others?
  • Are happy to have found a topic for gossiping later?

This sounds really silly but don’t know when on life this is going to stop. Let’s find out where it starts and what on earth really it is.

When it starts?
On completing UG:
Neighbors, relatives mostly all around you, whenever you happen to run in to them or vice versa, they asked this silly question – “Degree mudichachu, any plans of getting married?” the very same question was asked at least a million times to your parents. Usually dads were the worst hit by this bubble! They have to encounter not only the neighbors and relatives, but the whole lot of friends, friends’ friends, priests in temple, astrologers well known to the family (astrologers actually, eagerly await this opportunity)

It sounds like a simple yes/no question but often give rise to series of when, what, where why, type of questions.

Like for example,

If the answer is yes, then you can imagine the rise in the level of curiosity in this already overly snooping lot.

And if the answer is no, again, this would give them a tiny amount of dissatisfaction but ultimately that do not deter them from asking “why not?”, “ok, she is too young, what is she going to do?”, “then when do you have the plans of getting her married?” etc.

Again there are these people who seamlessly irritate you by suggesting/ bringing to your notice a few bachelors that they know of.
Why do they bother? (me to myself)Me: (Sigh!.... No answer)
On completing PG
So now this lot would have decided that you have no other go other than getting married. They cannot tolerate you getting that job you struggled to get through various placement interviews at your college.

At this stage when you finish your PG and you are placed in an organization, this lot is cluttered with a series of ingenious questions. Like, “does the job profile suit you?” “Is it a good company?” “What are the benefits like?” “Do you have night shifts? Oh! What kind of job is it!” worst of all, “What’s the salary like?” and the ultimate, “So its time to really get married?”

On the job
Now if you still haven’t decided to get married, this question becomes a nightmare in your life. You have to encounter this at least a zillion times a day. The more you grow old the more grows the inquisitive bubble.

Post marriage
Finally, you have successfully got rid of the nightmare. But wait a minute; the worst comes in the form of “Any good news?” You have to negotiate even your servant maids, office assistants, security guards, peers, (sometimes it becomes a peer pressure!) so on and so forth. Mostly these neighbors and relatives, they assume that your private life is pathetic. They, sometimes, even feel bad for your husband. This really is frustrating.

New mom
Now you are a new mom, a complete woman - as the bubble says, though they would never spare you without questioning. What the hell now? This one is about your career. “When are you getting back to work?”, “How are you going to manage?” “Your job profile won’t provide enough room for your baby?” etc

They often come up with numerous clever ideas like, “Why can’t you take up the bank exams?” “I think you can become a school teacher or a lecturer, that way you can easily manage family and work and also will have time to relax”

On job again and your baby’s first birthday
This time you have guessed it right, it is “When are you planning the next one?” This is too much now and the bubble often becomes a syndrome at this stage. Now we are much matured and consciously try to avoid such encounters. But, there is always no stopping them, they would go beyond the limit and bore you with their adventurous stories of managing three/four kids. They still go further and tell you how you can satisfy your husband’s physical needs and still manage two kids! How to develop companionship in your first child, blah blah

And why the hell do the bother?
Me: Startled (and No answer yet).

New mom 2
Now, you are almost relieved of the bubble, which just disappeared. Most of these people now won’t have anything to discuss about you. But still few manage to bring forth that stupendous question, “When are you planning to get back to work?” There we go again.

I don’t know what really bothers these people. Why are they so nosy? Please tell me if you know the answer.